When you've nothing else to do, laugh.

Sometimes, I think it's nice to just do nothing for a while. Well, I say do nothing... like, carry on breathing. And normally drink coffee. I like doing this because an unoccupied brain can come up with pretty awesome stuff. And by awesome, I mean weird. 

And today, when I had my "brain doing nothing" session, I was sat opposite an advert board. One of the ones that rotates between three images. These have fascinated me for ages. I spent my formative years staring at them, wondering how they could possibly work. Like, three or even four sheets inside a box with seemingly room for only one inside!?!?!?!?

Anyway, I was staring at one of these magical, entrancing things, my mind happily skipping through the car park of destiny, when part of me started taking notice of the adverts flashing up, and twisting them into new, weird things. Things which I'm here to share with you today!

So, first up...

When I saw this one, my heart skipped a beat. If it was a film, the Jaws theme tune would have started playing. My internal monologue read the "Don't worry, there are lots more inside" with that super creepy "I'm about to do an evil laugh" voice. I started to wonder whether, inside the shop, there were crowds of posters advertising oat milk, whether, once I set foot inside, I would be able to leave before being herded by magically moving posters towards the "free from" section, and then surrounded by litre cartons of oaty goodness, waving placards with "We are the lots more inside" and saying, in small oaty whispers, "We are oaty, we are oaty, we are oaty..." until I ran screaming from the shop. 

Then, that night, when I was lying in bed, a parade of individual oats, with even smaller placards would dance around my bed saying "no more oat milk! No more oat milk!"

and then finally, a small whisper "Too busy to look at these? Don't worry. There are lots more. Everywhere."

So, the next poster rolls out of nowhere into being. This one I enjoyed because I thought about howthis picture must have been taken. And the skill required to line up a cat and a dog, with the dog looking straight at the cat, in the same shot. So, you need to get the cat to sit still. That's hard enough. Then, you need to get the dog into position behind the cat. At this, any self respecting cat is going to turn tail and walk away. Because, you know. Dog. Inferior being, in the eyes of a feline. So you then need to reposition the cat. The dog, being a dog, will happily sit and wait while you do this, as long as you give it fuss later. Human lovers. But, what's harder, is getting the dog to look at the cat, but not chase the cat, and the cat to look away from the dog and everything else. Disdainfully.

Now, normally cats can do disdainful. But on command?

So, food. Food to attract a dog and not a cat, and to attract a cat and not a dog. 

I think, catnip and carrots are being waved wildly behind the scenes here. 

And finally, it rolls around to the third, and final poster, and the one which is most disturbing to me. Why? 

Because it offers a bagel lunchbox. 

A lunchbox for bagels. 

A box so small and so round that nothing but a bagel might fit inside it. 

but wait, there's more. because I happen to know that bagels come in... shock horror.... different sizes.

I know, right?

And even worse, people put different amount of filling inside them!

So this so called "bagel" so called "box" not only limits the brand of bagel you buy, the number of bagels you can eat, but the amount of filling you can put inside them. 

And I'm sorry, but to me, that's a full on nightmare.

So, this is the end of this post. What weird, thought scattering things have you seen?