'The Swan Princess' - is it worth watching?

Good morrow readers.

I say, you know those annoying couples on social media who are constantly in and out of the same relationship, and insist that one day they hate each other, and then the next are posting thousands of couple selfies and declaring that their love will last a lifetime?

Yeah, somebody made a movie about them. And we're going to review it!

Released in 1994, The Swan Princess is an animated film very, very loosely based on the ballet Swan Lake, and when I say loosely, I mean it in the sense that there's no Tchaikovsky to be found here. Depending on your point of view, this can be either a good or bad thing.

The story begins with the birth of Princess Odette, who we first see being lovingly handed to her father, King William

No mention of her mother is ever made, so I'm just going to presume that he bonked one of the servants.

At her christening, Odette is arranged to be married to Queen Uberta's son, Derek, and every summer from then on, the children are forced to spend time together in the hope that they fall in love. However, the children take an instant dislike to one another, and throughout a surprisingly catchy musical number, they grow up singing about how much they cannot stand each other.

Here they are, spending quality time with one another.

However, in a scene that totally isn't ripping off Sleeping Beauty, suddenly a grown-up Derek and Odette lock eyes and realize they love each other. Yep, despite the film clearly emphasizing that they cannot stand each other and have nothing in common, apparently their love truly was meant to be.

Then Derek absent-mindedly implies that he only loves Odette for her looks (what a shocker!) and they suddenly hate each other again. Truly, this is the love of a lifetime.

But oh no! The evil sorcerer Rothbart ambushes King William and daughter as they return home, and he kidnaps Odette whilst leaving her father to bloodlessly die in a ditch. He then turns Odette into a swan, the spell only wearing off in the moonlight, and he declares that he will only free her once she marries him and gives him his father's kingdom. Only Prince Derek can save her now, by declaring a Vow of Everlasting Love.

Yeah, she 's screwed.

The story itself is pretty basic, but it does have a few surprises along the way, especially in the climax (even though the plot’s ‘twist’ is as obvious as it can get). I would’ve liked to have seen more elements from the ballet and the folk tale on which it is based – Rothbart originally had a daughter called Odile, who deceives the prince by taking on Odette’s appearance, and this would have made an interesting addition to the story; it’s not often that villains have children, and it would be interesting to see what this character’s perspective would be. But alas, Swan Princess plays it fairly safe.

As you can see from my synopsis, there is one massive problem in this movie, and it is the two main characters. Odette and Derek have about as much personality as a pair of Barbie and Ken dolls.

Scratch that, these two were far more interesting.

Initially, their character set-up was promising - the first song of the film is a montage of the two growing up, and how as children they could barely stand one another. This is the best part of the film, in my view, as it is charming and it does a good job of setting up the two leads' personalities.

The problem is, it then completely dumps all this development in the final verse, and the two instantly fall in love when they are grown up. There's very little foreshadowing of this event, and so it comes across as being incredibly superficial, as if their attraction really were based on appearance. All their previous development is thrown out in favour of them becoming the generic 'prince and princess' stereotype, complete with googly eyes and sappy love duets.

Kiss me Derek - the marketing department demands it!

Now, there's nothing wrong with any of that. It is clear that Swan Princess is highly influenced by Disney movies, and wants to replicate some of that magic. However, by the time that Swan Princess was released, Disney had realized that their main couples actually needed to have personalities and interesting story arcs in order to engage with modern audiences. Derek and Odette perhaps have a glimmer of that - Odette is certainly no pushover, and frequently stands up to Rothbart, and Derek is driven by his need to prove his love for Odette - but they are never allowed to fully explore this aspect of themselves. As a result, they don't make for particularly interesting leads.

As a result, the film then makes the cardinal error of over-relying on its background characters in order to sell the story. The songs are also guilty of this as well – instead of moving the story along, quite a few actually slow everything right down, and contribute nothing to the story. The most egregious example is the song ‘Practice,’ which involves Derek deciding to use the palace musicians as target practice.

So, in terms of story, characters and music, Swan Princess is depressingly average. However, I must confess that there are a few things I like about it. For one thing, I really like its atmosphere. The backgrounds in this movie – with their dark forests, sparkling lakes and castles -  are gorgeous to look at and really give a fairy tale vibe. This is enhanced by the soundtrack, which perfectly complements the whimsical setting. Even if the story isn’t convincing, the world it takes place in certainly is.

I also appreciate how un-ironic the whole thing is, especially in this post-Shrek era of fairy tales. The Nostalgia Critic once described Swan Princess as being the sort of film that Enchanted was making fun of, especially in its clichés and sentimentality. However, while I think that is completely true, I kind of appreciate it for being that, talking animals and all. I get the sense that it’s trying to be like the old, classic Disney movies, rather than being anything subversive.

So all in all, I would give The Swan Princess a 5/10. It’s not a terrible animated film by any means, and there’s a lot that kids would probably enjoy, but its weak leads and over-reliance on filler will leave more discerning viewers unsatisfied. Certainly not an ugly duckling, but by no means a swan either.